Train Etiquette

Throughout my masters degree Aileen and I would rant about how awful the people on ScotRail trains are and how they do not follow simple train etiquette manners. Similarly in my new job, my colleague Sarah and I have started complaining about the awfulness of people on trains. What is it with some people who cannot obey the simple rules of train etiquette?!

The Rules of Train Etiquette

1. No eating smelly food. One Burger King portion of chips stinks out a whole carriage for the entire journey. It’s disgusting. Eat before you board your train. Glasgow-Edinburgh is every fifteen minutes. Can you not sit at the tables provided at Queen Street’s Burger King and stay there whilst you devour your highly disgustingly smelly meal!?

2. Play your music quietly. I don’t want to listen to your dodgy music collection too! It’s bad enough when the music is just loud enough to hear the beat, but truly irritating when you can hear the entire song in full because your volume it at 11. The rest of the carriage doesn’t need bleeding ears, thanks.

3. When answering a call, don’t shout. Just because the caller is 10 miles away from you doesn’t mean you have to scream down the phone in an otherwise silent carriage. We aren’t all interested in how your guttering will be fixed tomorrow, okay?

4. This is the most important one and shall be explained in terms of a diagram. The rules for sitting at a table:


The most irritating of times is when the train is almost empty, and person 2 sits opposite person 1 on the table. There is NO REASON to give yourself less leg room!!! These people are implementing a sub optimal train seat allocation algorithm!

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